respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
