I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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