Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
