8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize