arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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