i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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