Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
