Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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