Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
