I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
