if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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