ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
