I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
It's never too late to be topless.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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