His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
