What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
