Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize