So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
