So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
