he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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