she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
