OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
