hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
