Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
