she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
