I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
