i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
420 ftw
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Randomize
