Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
