if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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