I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
