Already got asked if we're dating
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
