you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
