Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
