I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
