OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
