i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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