i just had sex bonerless
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
You have to summon your inner elephant
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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