You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
