And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
