I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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