Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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