1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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