Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
sick fucks of a feather flock together
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
