my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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