Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
