my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Randomize
