Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
