Nicole vs. Life
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
God gave him joint rollers for hands
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
third nipple confirmed
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
