If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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