He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
