I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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